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Category Archives: Speech Therapy Humor

4 Funny Things to Say to Your Speech Therapy Students on a Friday

4 Funny Things to Say to Your Speech Therapy Students on a Friday

I’m a self-proclaimed jokester. I love to joke around with my students in speech therapy because I have found that humor always helps to set the stage for a fun AND functional speech therapy session. Jokes are the best! And once Friday rolls around, watch out because Mr. Jokester Raj is always in FULL jokester mode.

Lookin’ for a few funny lines to throw at your students this Friday?

Look no further, my friends, because I got ya’ll covered. The following four sentences are four of my all-time favorites Friday jokes to say to my students and they always generate a bunch of smiles and chuckles. Feel free to give these gems a try this Friday:

  • If you try your hardest today in speech, I promise to convince the principal to close school tomorrow.
  • Actually, if you try super duper hard today, I’ll do all that I can to convince the principal to close school tomorrow AND the next day.

Or you could call the shots with givin’ your students some time off:

  • Wow! You’re doing so great with your goals and objectives. Ya know what? Take the day off from school tomorrow. You deserve it!
  • Actually, on second thought, I think you deserve the next two days off from school because you are doing THIS well in speech!

Introduce some language goals and objectives, too!

Encourage your students to describe WHY and HOW what you just said was a joke. Are they able to comprehend the fact that there was no school to begin with on Saturday and Sunday? And HOW and WHY you took that fact into consideration when you said that joke to them in the first place? Subtle language aspects like these can be a bit tricky for some of our students to understand and put into words, so you can easily do a bit of practicing with these types of Friday jokes.

In closing . . .

It’s always important to remember that humor is subjective. So before you try out the silly Friday examples above, please do make sure that the given students understand that you are just pullin’ their legs in a playful way. And if you think up any other funny Friday jokes, please do let me know so I can use ’em, too. Thanks, in advance, for sharing the sillies with me. You are an awesome jokester!

3 Strange Places That No Speech-Language Pathologist Should Ever Be Forced to Work In

3 Strange Places That No Speech-Language Pathologist Should Ever Be Forced to Work In

School-based speech-language pathologists are no strangers to being forced to provide speech-language therapy services in, well, STRANGE places. For example, an old broom closet, an old custodian closet, or even smack dab in the middle of the school’s cafeteria (while the band was on stage practicing their instruments). Boy oh boy, just when I think I’ve heard it all, I get one more email about an odd place that a fellow clinician is being forced to work in.

So wacky right? Ugh!

If it were up to us, we would ALL absolutely have our own classrooms because it only makes sense that a location like that would enable ALL of us to create an environment conducive to learning and growth. But I know, not all of us are able to have our own classrooms for one reason or another, and though we aren’t thrilled about that fact, we will survive (because speech-language pathologists are THEE most adaptable educators on the planet). However, we want to make it loud and clear that there are a few locations that we REFUSE to work in, so I compiled a list that highlights the top 3 locations that we will NOT provide speech-language services in. Never. Ever!

1. The roof of the school.

Listen, I really don’t think I’m going to be able to give that articulation assessment appropriately because the wind keeps blowing in my ears each time I try to hear if the student pronounced the target sound in the right manner. So, yea, don’t ask me to move my desk to the roof of the school because it ain’t happening. Oh, and I hate heights. Thanks but no thanks.

2. In the tree right next to the school.

Wait, do I look like I have feathers? Trees are for birds, NOT clinicians. Imagine sitting on a branch while attempting to track data with one hand while trying to keep balance with the other. It’s an accident waiting to happen! So, yea, don’t ask me to move my desk up to the tree right next to the school because it ain’t happening. Oh, and I don’t particularly enjoy the idea of a bird pooping on me while I’m trying to write a progress note. Thanks but no thanks.

3. On the ceiling of a classroom.

Yes, it’s obvious that the school is overcrowded and that floor space is limited, but the idea that we might be able to take advantage of the ceiling space is a bit insane, don’t cha think?! I mean, do you really think it’s a good idea to ask the custodians to nail my desk to the ceiling?! How are my students and I supposed to work on various lessons WHILE we’re upside down?! So, yea, don’t ask me to do the whole ceiling thing because it ain’t happening. Oh, and the thought of me accidentally dropping my iPad and having it fall from the ceiling down to the floor is terrifying (it already has enough bumps and bruises on it). Thanks but no thanks.

In closing . . .

So, are you being forced to work in an unusual place? If you are, don’t fret because it could be worse, right? You could be on the roof, in a tree, or upside down on the ceiling, HAHA! But in all seriousness, if our building principals and/or administrators want to keep us SLPs happy, just give us our own room to work our miraculous speech-language therapy magic in because we SO deserve it. 😉

4 Imaginary Speech Therapy Apps That I Wish Were Real

4 Imaginary Speech Therapy Apps That I Wish Were Real

As you already know, I create some of the most fun and affordable speech therapy apps around. Apps like Multiple Choice Articulation, I Dare You Articulation, and Charades Articulation have been downloaded hundreds and hundreds of times and believe me, I’m working hard to continue to make new speech therapy apps just for you. But ya know what? There are a few speech therapy app ideas that I’ve had in my noggin for quite a while now and I haven’t gotten around to making them. The reason why is because these particular ideas are a bit “out there.” In fact, they’re so “out there” that I don’t even think it’s possible to create ’em right now.

Would you like to know about these app ideas?

Sure you would (haha!) so that’s why I wrote this blog post. Below you will find four of my favorite imaginary speech therapy app ideas that I wish I could make. Oh boy, if these apps were real, they would absolutely make my life as a school-based speech-language pathologist so much easier. My hope is that someone reading this post might be smart enough to actually create one (or all) of these apps. And if you do create ’em, please do let me know because I will totally purchase each and every single one!

A sneeze warning app!

This app would sound a warning noise right before a student sneezed all over me. The warning would give me enough time to grab a tissue for the student and to also whip out the hand sanitizer. Just gotta do what I gotta do to keep myself and my speech therapy room germ-free, ya know?

A homework reminding hologram app!

This app would create a hologram of me. Then, after going into the setting part of the app, I could program it to send the Mr. Raj hologram over to my students’ houses. The Mr. Raj hologram would knock on their doors and remind them to do their speech homework. This would absolutely do the trick and improve my homework return rate, for sure!

A missing game pieces app!

This app would be able to utilize GPS technology to somehow locate all of my missing game pieces that I just can’t seem to find. For example, that one random Jenga block that vanished last week or those two puzzle pieces that disappeared last month. Where oh where could they be?!

A dream monitor app!

I don’t know about you, but sometimes (err, lots of time) I have nightmares about IEPs and IEP meetings. This app is simple, it would monitor my dreams for me while I slept in an effort to stop bad IEP dreams before they happened. What I mean is if at any moment my pleasant dreams started to turn sour because crazy thoughts of IEPs started to rush the given dream, the app would automatically delete the IEP portions of my dream and replace them with more pleasant visions, like, ice cream. Or the beach. Or a puppy. Or maybe even combine all three: a puppy on a beach eating ice cream. Now that sounds like a much better dream than one that had to do with IEPs!

In closing . . .

My fingers and toes are crossed that someone out there can turn these imaginary speech therapy apps into a reality. If you’re that special someone, get crackin’ on programming those apps. I guarantee that you WILL become a millionaire. Enjoy the cash, buddy! 😉

6 Zombie Jokes That Will Make Speech-Language Pathologists Giggle to Death

6 Zombie Jokes That Will Make Speech-Language Pathologists Giggle to Death

When I say the word October, what’s the first thing you think of? Pumpkins? Caramel apples? Oh wait, probably Halloween, right? Well, for some reason, the first thing that pops into my mind is the word zombies. October is one heck of a spooky month and there just isn’t anything more spookier than zombies. (Well, maybe having 10 IEP meetings in one week. That’s actually spookier, but you get the gist!)

Long story short, zombies are AWESOME!

I love zombies. So with that statement being said, I wanted to take this opportunity to tell you some speech therapy related zombie jokes. Why? Because the world needs MORE speech therapy related zombie jokes and I’m just the guy to deliver them to ya (hehe!). So without further ado, boys and ghouls, get ready to laugh your heads off!

Question: Why do zombie students simply love their SLPs?
Answer: Because they have huge BRAAAINS!

Question: Why did the zombie student always bring back her speech homework?
Answer: Because she was DEADicated!

Question: How do you know if a zombie student needs speech therapy?
Answer: If he says BWAAAINS instead of BRAAAINS!

Question: What is a baby zombie’s favorite toy to play with in speech therapy?
Answer: A DEADY bear!

Question: What kind of candy do zombie students NOT want to see in the speech prize box?
Answer: LIFE savers!

Question: What time does the school-based zombie SLP usually get to work?
Answer: At around ATE o’clock!

In closing . . .

Can you think of any other speech therapy related zombie jokes? If you, please share them with me on Twitter because your jokes will make happier than a little zombie piglet playing in a bathtub filled with mud and brains. LOL! As always, I look forward to hearing from you!

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